van Der Merwe (No, Not That One) Is Starting To Worry

THEY MAY strut around as if they are Rugby's Master Race; they never miss the opportunity to remind the rest of us who are the defending champions at the ongoing Rugby World Cup, but, as we have seen this week, when it comes to mind games, our South African friends are not the sharpest knives in the box.

The indignation being demonstrated by their keyboard warriors, at the merest light-hearted suggestion: that perhaps Jock and Paddy could get together in a sort of demonic Celtic pact, to ensure the “right” result from Saturday's little Parisian punch-up – that result ensuring that Scotland and Ireland advance to the last eight, while South Africa go home. Well, you would think we had suggested killing their first-born.

A pauchle much as the notion appeals to me, just aint gonna happen, for several reasons.

1. The Fat Mancunian would need to be involved, and he couldn't organise a piss-up in a brewery.

2. Even if he could, he would probably want such a massive “consultancy fee” the Irish would never agree.

3. This is Scotland we are talking about.

Let's face it, we have a proud reputation for messing-up when in a strong position, going back several hundred years. It's the Scottish way. I can envisage a scenario whereby, Finn Russell, having absolutely bossed the game and settled once and for all, who is the premier ten in world rugby; and having slotted every kick on the day, misses the sitter, from head-on to the posts, in injury time, which would have given Scotland the result we need to go through, and we are out, by a single point. To me, that's the most-likely way things will end.

Meanwhile, let's see what other screen plays we can write, to keep our South African friends on edge.

For a start, I understand this picture has caused much wailing and gnashing of teeth in Jo'burg, Pretoria, Cape Town and all points south of the Limpopo. Those poor Boers, wondering what mischief is being cooked up here:

 

BECAUSE he's an Ayrshire boy and, Ah Kent his faither, I've always had a soft spot for D'Arcy Rae. So, I was delighted to see him joining Mark Bennett in the Ayrshire Missionary Society's Edinburgh branch office. I think he will prove to be a very-handy acquisition to the capital side.

Mind you, D'Arcy coming home is, to me a worrying sign for the SRU. Quite clearly, the Viv Nicholson economic model in top-flight English club rugby isn't working. OK, our few world-class players will have the option of doing a Finn Russell and going to France, but, I can see, as economic reality hits home, fewer top Scots taking the high road south.

Already, we are starting to see a log jam in the professional game. With only two full-time professional sides, some players who have the potential to shine in the United Rugby Championship are not going to get their shot at glory, while some others might not get enough game time and may be lost to the game.

It really is time, I feel, for the SRU to set-up that third full-time professional side, we certainly now have sufficient players to fill three rosters. I can envisage a system whereby, at the start of each season we select four squads:

1. A 30-man SCOTLAND squad, our most-likely Six Nations and (when it happens) World League squad. These guys will mainly play for Scotland, but, will be leased out to the professional sides for European games and the tier one league games (against the Irish and South African sides).

2. A 30-man GLASGOW squad, to handle the bulk of the URC games.

3. A 30-man EDINBURGH squad, with the same remit.

4. A 30-man DEVELOPMENT squad, to play in the URC.

Under-pinning that we have Super Rugby, but, hopefully, with the flaws in the current format ironed-out. Make it basically an Under-23 competition, the bulk of the squads have to meet that age grouping, but, have a small number of older, more-experienced players in there to offer guidance and an example.

I would also like to see a SCOTLAND A squad formed, limited to players who have not played in the Six Nations or World League. We should be looking to send this squad on-tour each summer, to play the Tier Two nations, or perhaps by hosting something akin to the old Churchill Cup competition at the end of the season.

There is also, I feel, a case for sending a CLUB XV squad, selected from the Super Rugby and Premiership clubs around Europe each Summer, to play the lesser European Nations.

The Scotland A squad could play the top eight in Europe: Portugal, Spain, Romania, Georgia, Netherlands, Belgium, Germany and Poland; the Club XV could face the nations below that: Croatia, Czechoslovakia, Lithuania, Ukraine, Sweden and Switzerland. Get out there, make friends and sell Scottish rugby.

The Scotland A team could also go on tour to the better Tier Two nations and further make friends around the world. Such exposure would, I am sure, make us in the long run, even-more-competitive at the top end.

The Rugby World is evolving and we need to be at the forefront of driving the changes that are coming.

Mind you, the Old Farts running World Rugby have this week shown, they are in no hurry to change things in the Rugby World Cup – other than the ridiculous decision to enlarge it to a 24-team competition. Clearly they are quite happy to maintain the status quo and we can look forward to even-more mismatches between Tier One, Two and Three sides.

It will not happen overnight, and at my age, I may not see it happen, but, in their determination to look after the Establishment nations, I can see the beginning of the end for the status quo. The lesser nations, fed-up being pissed on from on high, will rebel and we will see change – which the Old Farts will not enjoy.