A Fun Weekend Around Millbrae - But No Laughter In Other Parts as Problems Mount

I AM a proud member of what, when the definitive history of the 20^th century is written, and it is still perhaps too-early for this to be done, will be called the troublesome generation – the post World War II “Baby Boomers.”

We were the result of our parents' raging hormones being largely suppressed by having to sort-out Adolf Hitler, Benito Mussolini, Hideki Tojo and their minions, only to be released in a tsunami of hoochmagandy once Enola Gray had done her worst and brought an end to hostilities. Fast forward some 20 years and we, thanks to the invention of The Pill, were able to bring sex, drugs and rock 'n' roll to douce, buttoned-up-the-back Presbyterian Scotland.

We were also the first generation to be able to travel abroad and get used to civilised licencing hours, to have money of our own and to spend it. We had our own fashions and styles, we were no longer younger clones of our parents, while more of us than ever before enjoyed the freedom of university life. Add the malign influence of television, demonstrating there was a world beyond cold, grey, forbidding Scotland – and the floodgates opened. Dear auld Scotia went to hell in the hand cart we were pushing.

Today, as yin o' the Auld Yins, I occasionally, when I hear what my wild grandweans are up to, think: maybe we went too far, but, I am not sufficiently enough of an old hypocrite to tut-tut at their antics. However, if I do make tomorrow's celebration of rugby bachanalia at Millbrae – the Land o' Burns Weekender, I shall have the good sense to make my excuses and leave before “Rugby Mum” and the Lassies fully summon-up the spirit of Cutty Sark and the Hellish Legions which lie heavily around those parts until enough Prosecco has been consumed for it to burst free.

I was actually in at the start of beach rugby in Scotland. Back in that terrible winter of 1962-3, when snow covered Scotland for weeks on end, and everything froze, the members of Ayr, Cumnock, Marr and Irvine Rugby Clubs would regularly convene on the beach at Ayr and play each other in a refined version of the game. It was great fun as I recall, the only problem was perhaps having to call a halt at the height of a game, when the incoming tide threatened to wash away a slight winger.

The Weekender is somewhat different. Hundreds of tons of sand dumped on a Millbrae pitch still recovering from a hard season, spectators in Hawaiian shirts and Bermuda shorts, a disco in a marquee, a barbecue, live music and Ayrshire's Bonnie Lassies in their finery. It's a recipe for fun, with rugby at its heart. I commend this weekend to the house – assuming @Sajid Javid gives his permission for it to go ahead.

RIGHT, that's enough frivolity, back to depressing reality. The National Reserve Leagues are, it seems, about to be scrapped – with a one season only set-up of East and West Reserve Leagues.

Sheila Begbie and the Rugby Development team at Murrayfield are, meanwhile, undertaking a wider-ranging and more-thorough review of the club game, an undertaking which is long overdue and welcome.

I cannot say what I am about to say often enough, but, the blindingly-obvious facts must be faced:

• Professional rugby is a money pit
  
  
• There simply is not the money in Scotland at the moment to properly fund more than the two full-time professional teams
  
  
• It would almost-certainly be better for the game if these two teams were not fully-owned subsidiaries of the SRU
  
  
• For as long as the SRU wants to be control freaks, the professional game will never have the commercial freedom perhaps necessary for it to flourish and for the other two full-time teams we probably need to be up and running.

The four statements above are, I believe, factually correct. Just suppose a multi-millionaire, obsessed with rugby, living perhaps in Ayrshire or the Borders, or maybe even up in Aberdeen, wanted to found a third Scottish side to compete in an expanded PRO14. He did due diligence and decided: ok, I will need to pay to bring a ground up to scratch, I may then have to absorb the team making a loss for the first five years, but, thereafter, it will pay for itself. I can afford it, I am going for it.

Immediately he runs into trouble, because, the SRU will only allow him to run his team, as a minority stakeholder – the big boys at Murrayfield will have the major say in how the team is run. At that point, faced with such control freakery, our would-be investor will tell TCD and MH33 where to go – no third team.

There are other blindingly-obvious facts to be faced:

• We need a proper development tier, so the best of our young talent is made ready for the professional game
  
  
• There is a case for such a tier being District-based, with the best young talent developing through their clubs, then coming together in inter-District play
  
  
• BUT – the D word must never be uttered around Murrayfield
  
  
• There is perhaps an even-better case for professional player development being the job of the two professional sides, by them running A or Under-23 teams, as is the case in England, Ireland and Wales
  
  
• BUT – Murrayfield is either unable, or unwilling, to fund such teams
  
  
• SO – Murrayfield has franchised out professional development to the Super-6 clubs, although, any outstanding youngster, such as scrum-half Jamie Dobie, will by-pass S6 and go straight into the pro teams' squads.

So, why not a root and branch reform of Scottish Rugby, whereby we came up with criteria for “Senior Rugby,” a level below S6, but above the normal club game. For a club to be considered “Senior”, it would need to have a ground of a certain standard: grandstand, floodlights, perhaps a 3G pitch, and be running at least 3 Xvs under-pinned by a youth development programme which met certain standards.

There would be a limit on how many clubs could initially be considered “Senior”. Certainly the ground standard criteria might help limit this. Below that, all clubs would be “Junior”, they would play in regionalised competitions. There would be less-stringent ground standards, but, they would need to have a functioning youth development programme. Paying players in “Junior Rugby” might be allowed – the game is after all open, but, clubs found to be breaching certain payment rules, would be in big trouble.

Of course, for this to work, the SRU would need to cede a lot of control to the Junior clubs, and, that, I am afraid is likely to be a major problem. It will take a long time for Murrayfield to be weaned-off control freakery.

To refer back to the problems facing the National Reserve Leagues. I can see no reason whereby the SRU's proposed Regional reserve leagues should not have a longer life than one year. Why, the SRU could even take a leaf out of Scottish Hockey's book and allow the top clubs' lower teams to play in the regional leagues.

However, I am convinced, unless the ordinary clubs are given more say, the game will die from the roots upwards. Time for action I think.