I Have A Better Use For The SRU's Half Million Earmarked For America

THE SRU'S half-million pounds sterling investment in Washington Old Glory might, in time prove a marvellous investment. Ah hae ma doots aboot that, but, you never can tell. However, I can think of an immediate and more beneficial use of some of that money.

Should our esteemed governing body not be hiring one or two Irish coaches in the dark arts of being “street-smart,” or maybe sending one or two of our coaches to whichever seat of learning on the Emerald Isle, which offers coaches in “cheating at rugby and how to get away with it.”

Because, if Edinburgh had been as good as Munster at these dark arts, they would now be looking forward – if that is the correct expression given the opposition they would be facing – to a Heineken Champions Cup semi-final.

Or, to be a bit less bitter and twisted, maybe the SRU should be working on training the hardest part of an athlete to get working properly – those crucial six inches between his ears. What was Henry Pyrgos thinking – conceding that penalty from which Keith Earls scored the first of his two tries on Saturday? And, what was Pierre Schoemann thinking, conceding the second?

Mind you, I do feel, had the positions been reversed, and had Pyrgos then done what Conor Murray did and body-slammed his opponent to the deck: does anyone Scottish doubt that the penalty would have been reversed? Or that if it had been, as in the Schoemann incident, an Irish prop who nudged a Scottish lock – no penalty would have followed.

Basically, we Scots don't know when and how to cheat, or when to wait for the right moment to sort-out an opposition nyaff. I've been seeing this for years, and we never seem to learn.

Any way, look at it this way. Saracens v Munster will be a meeting of two thoroughly unlikeable teams. We are maybe well out of it.

WARRIORS' heavy defeat to Saracens was very depressing. It was Men against Boys and another hard lesson learned. Glasgow are a bit like your typical British tennis or golf professional.

On their day, in an ordinary tour match, they will win, but, come the big occasions – the Majors or the Grand Slam events – when the pressure really comes on, they will crumble. We really need to sort-out this failing.

I don't know, but, I hope, Independence might, in time, change the Scottish mind set and we find more sporting Andy Murrays or Chris Hoys or Jackie Stewarts, capable of taking us to the topmost sporting level.

SATURDAY was a huge day for the club game. I did flag-up the Scottish Cup semi-finals in my preview, so congratulations to Ayr and Heriot's, who will now go head-to-head twice: on Saturday, at Millbrae, in the Tennent's Premiership Grand Final, then again, Saturday, 27 April, in the Scottish Cup Final, the big game in that day-long celebration of the club game: “Silver Saturday” at Murrayfield.

When it became clear, Ayr and Melrose would be playing back-to-back semi-finals, the consensus among the regulars in the press seats at Millbrae was: “Melrose to win here in the Play-Off semi-final, then Ayr to turn them over the following week at The Greenyards.

Maybe, if Fraser Thomson had been fit, that might have been how it turned out, but, in the end, the fact Melrose had a slightly-longer injury list conspired against them and Ayr won both games. The two finals will be interesting, and are very hard to call.

I thought for a minute or two, as I followed Saturday's events at Goldenacre on twitter, that another epic chapter in Hawick history was about to be written. But, Heriot's did what good teams do, they made home advantage count. But, the Greens gave them a bit of a fright.

But, what of the other big games on Saturday – the club clashes which I failed to properly flag-up before-hand. Well, one thing we did learn from the minor semi-finals, in the League Cup, the National Shield and the National Bowl is – notwithstanding the SRU's disgraceful failure to give rugby north of the Forth a stake in Super-6, there is life there.

For instance, the Bowl Final, which traditionally kicks-off Silver Saturday, will be an all-Caledonia affair, with Aberdeenshire taking-on DUMS – the Dundee University Medical Students. In the semi-finals, 'Shire edged-out Edinburgh Northern 14-10, while in a game where, perhaps one side should have donned surgical scrubs and the other white coats, DUMS beat GUM, their Glasgow Uni Medics counterparts, 17-12.

I am delighted to see 'Shire, a venerable old club – they once had Ken Scotland wearing their number 15 shirt, when he was Scotland captain – who have known some difficult times of late, back on the big stage. And well done too to the Tayside students, for getting this far. The way student rugby in Scotland has drifted away from the mainstream to BUCS play is upsetting to us older romantics, so, well done DUMS for getting this far.

The Shield Final will be an East v West affair, with Berwick facing another grand old team on the way back after a fallow spell – Greenock Wanderers.

In the semi-finals, Berwick comfortably beat Royal High 33-10, while Wanderers just edged out Strathmore 21-20, result which will no doubt make Wanderers' Brendan McGroarty, the former Scotland Club XV and Hawks centre, insufferable for the next month. Ach! Who am I kidding, well done you and your boys Brendan.

Finally, to the final which doesn't make the big pitch on Silver Saturday – Why? The League Cup show down. This will be an all-Caledonia affair, with Highland taking on Aberdeen Grammar. Highland, favourites to accompany Biggar into National League 1 next season, took a break from the promotion race on Saturday to edge out Musselburgh – who are themselves very-much in the mix for the final slot in next season's Premiership – 30-28, in the first semi-final.

In the second semi, Kelso's hopes of having a chance to put last season's final loss to Dumfries behind them, were dashed as they lost 34-13 to Aberdeen Grammar.

TODAY, Scottish Rugby's future goes on show at Murrayfield, with the two National Youth Cup Finals.

First-up is the Under-16 affair, with Biggar facing seemingly perennial finalists Stirling County. Then, in the Under-18 final, Boroughmuir face another of youth rugby's power-houses, Ayr. This one should be a cracker too.