Aristotle Armstrong

Aristotle Armstrong
The thrawn, alternative voice of Scottish Rugby

Friday, 18 March 2022

Lost - One Dressing Room; If Found Please Contact Mr Gregor Townsend, SRU, BT Murrayfield, Edinburgh

TO QUOTE Groucho Marx: “These are my principles – and if you don't like them, I have others.” So, don't start slagging me because, two posts after praising the job he has been doing as Scotland Coach, I now suggest – maybe Gregor Townsend's time to go has come.

Quite simply, from what has transpired in the past couple of days, it seems to me: Toony has lost the dressing room.

It's been obvious for some time, the Coach and Playmaker Finn Russell is not a marriage made in Heaven. While I still think Toony has lost the plot completely by dropping Finn and handing Blair Kinghorn the number ten jersey in Dublin tomorrow, the discovery that it wasn't just – as had been rumoured earlier in the week, Russell who broke team orders and went on the bevvy on Saturday night: Stuart Hogg, Ali Price, Darcy Graham, Sam Johnson and Sione Tuipulotu added their names to that stellar list of Scotland stars who have gone AWOL, behaved badly and generally shat in the nest.

Still, this should not be seen as professional suicide, after all, didn't the current Chairman of the SRU Board disgrace himself many moons ago, turning the venerable Calcutta Cup into the 'Calcutta Plate.'

Let's look at the gang we must now call: The Edinburgh Six:

  • Stuart Hogg – captain of Scotland; 92 caps; triple British & Irish Lion

     

  • Finn Russell – vice-captain of Scotland; 62 caps; double British & Irish Lion

     

  • Ali Price – former vice captain of Scotland; 50 caps; British & Irish Lion

     

  • Darcy Graham – 26 caps

  • Sam Johnson – 23 caps

     Sione Tuipulotu – 5 caps


Hardly, Tuipulotu apart, a bunch of daft young boys – the other five have over 250 caps between them and at least Hogg, Russell and Price are members of the Scotland squad 'Leadership Group.' To put it in the vernacular: “They should ken better.”

OK, Toony just might be able to make a case for benching Russell for Dublin on the grounds that he hasn't been “Finntastic” this season, and, on the grounds of team discipline, well, he has previous in ignoring instructions to lay-off the bevvy.

But, his fucking team captain was involved. Hoggy will lead the team out in Dublin, which is a lot better outcome for indiscipline than befell Billy Bremner or Barry Ferguson, Scotland football captains who decided to have a wee unauthorised swally while on national duty – neither played for Scotland again.

If I was Finn Russell, I'd maybe give serious consideration to telling Toony where to shove his Scotland shirt, after all, a world-class talent such as Finn, who opts out of international rugby, is a much-more attractive signing option for the big money English and French clubs than a guy who is going to be away regularly for his national team.

Russell will turn 30 in September, his next playing contract will almost certainly be his last big-money one, if he tells Scotland to shove it, it might add a couple of zeroes to his worth.

Maybe Toony has done him a favour.

As for the rest, well, Tuipulotu apart, they owe Scotland huge games in Dublin. If they don't burst their respective guts, the fans will crucify them. Maybe Toony knows his players and can guarantee a reaction, but, from where I am sitting, I think he's lost the dressing room and the plot. Taxi for Townsend, perhaps.




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