Aristotle Armstrong

Aristotle Armstrong
The thrawn, alternative voice of Scottish Rugby

Thursday, 29 November 2012

Ignore The Lions Tour - It's Still Too Early

HERE we are in the last few days of the Autumn International Window and the Fans With Laptops who write about rugby in the mainstream media (MSM) are running out of ideas for things to write about.
 
Of course, these days, with even The Scotsman and The Herald becoming as obsessed with fitba as the Daily Ranger and The Hun, you don't get much sensible rugby writing there anyway. That said, chapeaux to Kevin Ferrie for a couple of excellent pieces both before and after Andy Robinson was handed his jotters, and to Tom English for a very good midweek piece this week in th Hootsman.
 
And, while I'm on my high horse -what will it take to get The Herald to properly cover the RBS Premiership, the high end of the club game in Scotland. This Monday round-up, done by a wee team of freelances who would barely know a rugby player if Dan Carter said hello, is an embarrassment to the paper which once boasted the must-read columns from McLaren.
 
Hopefully the replacement editor for the hapless Master Russell will do a wee bit better.
 
Anyway, to get back on-track. Rugby comment these days is, courtesy of Sky and the dominance of the London-based papers in the MSM mainly about England. That's OK if you're reading the excellent Brian Moore, otherwise, it's shite - a wee bit like the current England team.
 
Sure, the current England squad is a work in progress, but, as I am sure Messrs McCaw, Carter & Co will demonstrate on Saturday, England is still far from the finished article.
 
In fact, with England on the upslope of their learning curve, Ireland on the downslope, Wales still to work-out they're not nearly as good as they think they are and us deep in the doo-da and seeking yet another Head Coach, British Isles rugby is not nearly as healthy as it should be some seven months from a Lions Tour.
 
The English-based papers have this week been filling space with World XVs and potential Lions XV selections. Have these writers no sense of history? Don't they know any "dream" Lions XV chosen ahead of the Six Nations leaves the guy whose by-line is on the story looking very silly by the end - particularly when the choice appears in an English paper and is subsequently loaded with Englishmen.
 
 
 
WE'VE got some competent players in the current Scotland squad; we've even got some good big men in there. But, one of the things which disappointed me about our big guys in the Autumn Tests, was how they didn't make their poundage count int he contact area.
 
Sure, we scrummaged very well indeed. In fact, the fact that nobody from south of Hadrian's Wall or on the other side of the Irish Sea noticed how well he scrummaged might be our secret weapon in the 6N. However, one of my abiding memories of the games was the way, given the ball in space and invited to make a dent in the Springbok defensive wall, Jim Hamilton, all six foot eight and 19 stones of him, was shunted backwards by a smaller Saffer.
 
The Saffer front five, when launched into space, seem to hit their stride faster and be a lot harder to stop, they create momentum -our broken field impact runners, apart from Sean Lamont, don't. And, fine runner though he is, can someone please tell me if Lamont has ever successfully off-loaded to a support runner?
 
Might it be we are not launching them properly? It seems to me we, even when we put the ball into the arms of say Euan Murray and Richie Gray off ruck ball, give it to them, too-soon, too-close tot he breakdown and when they are moving too-slowly.
 
Better perhaps to have them wider-out, and coming onto the ball at pace. Of course, the drawback to this is our concern that our forwards would be unable to take a pass delivered at pace, then to hold onto the ball in contact, because our individual skills are somewhat lacking.
 
I accept that our professional rugby teams work harder than do our professional football teams. They lift the poundage in the gym, they work on scrums, line-outs and the contact area (not all that well in the latter area perhaps). But, I worry, do they spend the time they should on individual skills? Their poor passing and decision-making in internaitonals leads me to believe the answer to that one is, no.
 
Let's hope Robinson's replacement can get Toony and Michael Bradley to correct these deficiences - quickly.

Tuesday, 27 November 2012

46-51-37-Hike - It's The Way Forward

IN THE aftermath of losing to Tonga and Andy Robinson's subsequent resignation, I am struggling for something to write about other than the current dire straits in which Scottish rugby finds itself. Time perhaps to be whimsical, to polish-up the Aristotle Armstrong model for brighter rugby.
 
It is time to do something about the current fad for bish, bash, bosh wars of attrition in rugby. Let's open-out the game and bring back running and handling - so, why don't we import an idea from rugby's basard child, American Football?
 
Let's allow limited forward passing. Of course, this will immediately hand the Welsh, who have been using the forward pass as a matter of course for years, an advantage, but, let's bear with it.
 
The biggest bug-bears in modern rugby, to most people are the squint feeds at the scrum and the way we have almost adopted American Football's method of advancing by yards in a series of "drives".
 
Of course, while AF has wisely decreed that you have to make at least ten yards in four drives, to keep the ball; in rugby, you can make less than ten inches in four drives and still retain possession.
 
But, to return to scrums. Since the IRB has apparently - without telling anyone, decreed that it is acceptable to put the ball into the second row of the scrum, why don't we simply clean-up the game, by getting rid of the pathetic croup, touch, set clap-trap. Instead of insisting on 3-4-1 or 3-2-3 scrum set-ups, let's go to the AF way and have a line of scrimmage? The side in possession retains possession and the hooker, has to "snap" the ball to the scrum-half - WHO THEN HAS THE CHOICE OF HOW HE PASSES - FORWARDS OR BACKWARDS.
 
A forward pass, even of the "Hail Mary" variety, at least gives the option of by-passing even the best blitz defences and moving the ball down field. The scrimmage does away with the nonsense of taing the hit, or whatever, the game would be more open.
 
I would keep the line-out - we have to do something to keep the likes of Richie Gray playing - but again,the scrum-half would have the option of the forward pass, a bit more accurate and likely to retain go-forward possession than the box kick.
 
 
 
HOWEVER, I cannot totally ignore Robinson's resignation and the business of the succession.
 
As with Scottish Football, currently also looking for a new national coach, I reckon it doesn't matter who gets the gig, unless wholesale changes are made elsewhere, we'll be going nowhere fast, other than backwards.
 
I wish Jim Telfer had stayed quiet. Great servant though he was to the game in Scotland, Creamy's days are past and honestly, having been once-bitten by Murrayfield machinations, will George Graham be all that ready to give the blazers a second bite at him?
 
Will Sean Lineen, having already been "promoted sideways" to give Toony some experience, be all that keen to take the big job, with which goes just one definite - if you don't resign, you'll be sacked, eventually; when he already has a cracking globe-trotting job? If I was Sean, having given what he has so far to Scottish rugby, I'd stay where I was.
 
No, until the revolution, I don't see us getting the right man in right now.
 
 
 
I AM already looking forward to Saturday, and the Millbrae match-up between table-topping Gala and Ayr. It might be a bit early to say this, but, this one could settle the RBS Premiership. It promises to be a cracking game.
 
By the way, I'd fancy Ayr's chances even more if they had Mark Bennett playing. Bennett turned-out for Stirling County at the week-end: why? Surely, if he had to be tied to a club side, then it should have been Ayr.
 
 
 
 

Monday, 26 November 2012

Forget A New Coach - Hire a Shrink

HERE we go again - "wanted, masochist to take charge of perennially under-performing national side: apply - SRU, Murrayfield, Edinburgh". Will the next sacrificial victim please make himself known?
 
I was never totally convinced by Andy Robinson; he was and still is a terrific coach, however, even when he was in charge of England, a much-bigger country, with a much-deeper player pool, there were doubts about his selectorial ability. I can see a selector/coach getting into a fankle when he has to decide between three players, of more or less equal ability, competing for one position, but that situation doesn't arise too-often in Scotland, or certainly as often as in England.
 
The more myopic or generous amongst us might have been able to make excuses for Scotland's defeat on Saturday - had we been playing a better-regarded team than Tonga, but, not withstanding their defeat of eventual finalists France in the last World Cup, there is really no way we should lose at home to the South Sea Islanders.
 
Yes, the referee let them away with murder at the breakdown, but, it has always been the case in rugby, if opponents insist on lying offside and slowing down your ruck possession, then you - the players, if the referee isn't seeing it, to sort it out.
 
How about, somewhere inside the opponents half, after several go-forward rucks have been illegally-disrupted by the opposition, you give the culprit a bit of a shoeing, then, when the referee produces the yellow card - your captain bluntly tells him: "Hey baw-bag, how come you could see our guys rucking him out of one ruck, but you couldn't see him lying offside at the last three? Either play fair or GTF."
 
A player might have to take a ten-minute seat, but, I'd wager you'd get a fairer call next time.
 
Ian McLauchlan always said that the player who said: "Do that again and you're for it" had lost the argument.
 
Hit them, then say: "That was your warning", was always the McLauchlan way - I think it worked.
 
However, to blame it all on the referee (again) would be wrong. The reality is, our players are lacking in the basic skills, and they don't have the mental strength which is necessary for international rugby.
 
I am fully aware that the six or so inches between the ears is the bardest part of the human body to boost. It's easy to spend hours in the gym bulking-up, a lot more-difficult to get the brains and particularly that secret something called "game intelligence" to work properly.
 
Back in 1958 the Brazilian FA, fully-aware that their players for the World Cup Finals in Sweden had the ability to win the tournament, but, doubting if they had the brains to do so, took along a psychologist with the party.
 
Brazil won, and it wasn't all about Garrincha, Didi and Pele. Fifty-four years later, maybe, instead of recruiting another Head Coach, the SRU should recruit a good psychologist - to convince our guys they have what it takes to win internationals.
 
The skills failings can be sorted out, just as our former lack of bulk has been, it's the mental failings which will hold us back for longer.
 
 
 
MIND you, we're not alone in having players lacking something upstairs. What was Andrew Hoare thinking about? This, of course, assumes a Kiwi hooker is capable of rational thought - discuss.
 
Then, what about England. The Saffers were there to be taken, but, England failed to beat them.
 
England, in truth, are not that good. English rugby players come from a culture of painting by numbers almost; every move has to be pre-planned. When it comes to ad hoc, off-the-cuff thinking, they are lacking and get things wrong.
 
I am sure Clive Woodward would have had a system in place for the position they found themselves in, awarded a penalty, three minutes from time, when four points behind - that's one situation when "painting by numbers" works.
 
England failed to take advantage, then, they blew their last chance by poor kick-off reception: they had three choices:
 
1, Let a kick-off which was obviously too-long and going straight-out, drift out, then take the attacking scrum back on half-way.
 
2, Let the number eight, the man in whose direction the ball was travelling, take it, set-up a ruck and then try to mount a series of drives aimed at getting you within range for a match-winning dropped goal (the 2003 option).
 
3, Mess it up totally.
 
They chose option three - how very English (or Scottish for that matter).
 
 
 
FINALLY, when will somebody else notice - the Welsh are not that  good either.

Thursday, 22 November 2012

Etzebeth -He'd Be In My Team At Carrick or Cumnock

I WAS delighted to see Eben Etzebeth, the big, nasty, South African lock, being cleared following his citing during last week-end's Murrayfield match.
 
He should never have been cited in the first case, was my view.
 
Now, I look forward to him rampaging around Twickenham, the non-stop booing of the Hooray Henries and Henriettas in the crowd inspiring him to greater heights. For, make no mistake, Etzebeth is the real deal, a worthy successor to the Matfields and Bothas, Andrews, Van Heerdens and Du Preez who have toiled before him in generations of Springbok boiler houses.
 
We rightly rate Richie Gray highly, but, given the choice I'd have Etzebeth first. As we say here in Ayrshire - he'd be in my team at Carrick or Cumnock. Sure, since rugby went professional, we've been able to discover and nurture some seriously big men, which is a bit of a change for Scotland, but, when it comes to using their power and physique,our big men are still a wee bit behind their Southern Hemisphere competition.
 
It was obvious on Saturday, our big impact runners, too often, were knocked backwards in the tackle, or failed to make a dent in the Saffers defence, while, their big men could get up to speed far faster and could regularly breach our first line of defence.
 
That has to be our next priority - getting our big men to accelerate quicker, get their bodies into the correct position and rumble over the top of the first line of tacklers, thereby getting us onto the front foot and able to produce quick, go-forward ball.
 
We also need to be a bit more ruthless at the break-down; if opponents are going to lie there, don't step over them, step on them - they'll soon get the message.
 
 
 
WITH the national side in action at Pittodrie and both the professional sides in Rabo Pro12 action, Scottish resources are stretched pretty thinly this weekend.
 
 
It is noticeable, however, that, for all the suggestions that there are not enough Scottish players good enough to be full-time professionals, we are doing none-too-badly in getting bodies onto the park.
 
For Friday night's meeting with Leinster, Glasgow will have ten home-grown Scots in their starting line-up, with a further six home-grown guys on the bench. Edinburgh's match-day squad for their clash with Ospreys isn't so Tartan-tinted, but, with seven starters and seven-eighths of their bench (plus-Scottish-qualified Greig Tonks) being Scottish, they are holding-up nicely.
 
Add the Scotland squad in Aberdeen, plus by my reckoning 12 capped players - including an entire back division - currently injured, we've got some depth of talent.
That injured back division by the way: say Rory Lamont at full back, a three-quarter line of Jo Ansbro, Graeme Morrison, Ben Cairns, Lee Jones and Chris Cusiter to Duncan Weir at half-back.
 
 
 


Tuesday, 20 November 2012

Farewell Chunk - Everyman In A Scotland Shirt

SO, it's farewell and thank you to "Chunk". Let's be honest, Scotland has had technically-better props, but I doubt very much if we have ever had one who was so-proud of having worn the thistle, or who had to work as hard to overcome the obstacles in his path to that single cap which all rugby internationalists receive.
 
Certainly, Chunk had his faults; his ball skills were at times sorely lacking; at one time he was a penalty against Scotland waiting to be given, but, he was, I always felt, our man in the team. We, particularly those of us whose active playing career peaked in one of those many club teams for whom the Saturday afternoon game is a chance to work up a Saturday night thirst, didn't have to make too-big a leap of imagination to see oorsels as "Chunk" - while we could barely dream of being Andy Irvine, or Gavin Hastings or Toony.
 
Enjoy what's left of your professional career Allan, and good luck. You have, I feel, timed your exit to percfection and that is always one of the hardest things to pull-off in top-flight sport.
 
 
 
SO, Sean Lineen is reeally starting to earn his corn in his new role as globe-trotting talent spotter for the SRU, with the English lad from the Chiefs dur to arrive soon and the latest "Kilted Kiwi" touching down this week with the Warriors. Not forgetting young Heathcote being fast-tracked into the national squad from Bath.
 
All very laudable, we have too-shallow a talent pool here in Scotland; however, I fear the SRU might be going down the same road as our top football teams, too-busy bringing in non-Scots, pseudo-Scots, kind-Scots and might-eventually-become-Scots to properly nurture real, born and bred Scots.
 
We still haven't got the mix right; we've got some good Scots who are being seen as shirt-fillers with our pro sides, while the imports are favoured; we've got other good, young Scots, playing well week-in, week-out in our excellent Premiership, who are I feel being over-looked or under-rated in comparison to the imports. This requires sorting-out.
 
 
 
AS A former Ayr player I am delighted that the Millbrae club has become the first to have its name engraved on the Bill McLaren Shield - by successfully winning four successive home games since it won the right to hold the Shield.
 
That said, two cup wins over Hillhead/Jordanhill and GHA were hardly surprises, since neither club is a top-flight outfit. Better, perhaps, to have the Shield only up for challenge in the RBS Premiership or in the later rounds of the Scottish Cup, when it's down to the  the Regional Cup Winners.
 
With due respect to "Hills" and GHA, getting your club's name onto the shield would have been far-more worthy if it had been achieved by winning four Premiership games in a row.
 
 
 
I LIKE Brian Moore. I know, shameful admission to make and surely my Tartan Army membership is under review and may be revoked. But, old "Pit Bull" by-and-large tells it like it is and he isn't afraid to have a go at the RFU, when he feels they need it.
 
However, when, in Monday's Telegraph, he penned a piece which purported that it was that nasty purple strip and what was apparently a particularly dire rendition of God Save the Queen which played big parts in the Australians winning at Twickenham on Saturday - well, it seemed to me his Celtic cousin Brynmor Moore had been at the lap top.
 
Brian, it's the Welsh you never beat - you only out-score in points. England lost because, they are not nearly as good as your media friends would like us all to believe they are.
 
Also, I cannot help wondering what Mr Moore and the English media would have made of matters had they had TC Clancy as referee, and he had performed as abyssmally as  he did at Murrayfield.

Sunday, 18 November 2012

That Referee's A Baw Bag - But It Wasn't All His Doing

NO EXCUSES HERE, WHEN PUSH CAME TO SHOVE, THE SAFFERS WERE TOO-GOOD FOR US, END OFF.

But, that having been said - might we have won with a referee other than Mr Clancy, or TC Clancy as I refer to him and there are no prizes for working-out what TC means. Not for the first time, but, hopefully for the last time, this obvious Jock-hater did us.

The inconsistency over the two 'truck and trailer' tries was disgraceful, but, given the way the IRB has apparently washed its hands of any responsibility for adequate refereeing, should we have been surpised. What we need is a Scottish captain who is prepared to get right into the referee's face, until he gives us our deserved share of the tight decisions, it doesn't matter what we do - we will lose.\

Of course, the neutering of the ruck has hampered Scotland greatly. The All Blacks have found a way round this, courtesy of Mr McCaw; why cannot we be like them. All I can say about the Saffers blatantly illegal slowing-down of Scottish rucks yesterday is - would they have managed this against a back row of Calder, Beattie or Paxton and Jeffery?

That trio would have trampled all over them, but, with referees such as TC Clancy, it will never happen. I'd like to see a Scotland captain tell the likes of Clancy, the first time opponents ilgally disrupt a ruck - 'Right, ref, if you will not blow them up, we will ruck them out and if you penalise us - we're off'.

However, having got my rant at refs out of the way, again our failure to do the basics under pressure cost us dearly. Take that brilliant attacking line-out, less than five metres from their line, near the end of the game. As Ross Ford came across to take the throw-in, I said: 'He'll fuck this up".

Needless to say - he did. Throwing-in is such a vital part of the hooker's armoury today and sadly, as has been proved too often in the past, under pressure, Ford crumbles. Time to say ta-ta.



OK, we are hurting just now, but, not nearly as much as the Welsh and the English, both of whom are, I believe, victims of believing the hype of their own media.

I have never bought into notions of Welsh greatness. I reckon they are the luckiest Six Nations Champions ever, You only have to look at the poor rugby their Rabo Pro12 teams are producing to see, all is not well in Wales - a lot of average players being over-hyped.

The same is true of England. English rugby is now like English football - a lot of well-paid foreigners bringing attributes to the teams which are beyond the native Englishmen, who are, perhaps even more than the Welsh, being over-hyped, by the Sky Sports bandwagon.

A wounded Aussie is always a dangerous beast, as England found-oput yesterday an, th the Saffers and ABs to come, things are about to get mighty tough for Stuart Lancaster, an able coach whose biggest short-term job is going to be dampening down English over-optimism and their supporters' belief in England - the Master Race in Rugby.



FINALLY, a wee bit of praise for Ryan Grant. Not that long ago, it was a case of: if anything happens to "Chunk" we're in deep doo-dah. By his recent performances, Grant is now unquestionably our Number One at number one and we should praise him for that.aA

Monday, 12 November 2012

No Surprise Then - We Got Well Beaten

AS I was saying on Saturday, that the All Blacks will beat Scotland is one of the four certainties in life, so, we need not be too-despondent at losing to arguably the greatest squad of players in the history of the game - at least two of which, Messrs McCaw and Carter, would surely be in any Earth XV to take on Mars.
 
Aye, we had our moments on Sunday, sadly, not enough of them; while once again that old Scottish Achilles heel, our inability to do the basics under extreme pressure, came back to bit our bums - back to the drawing board then.
 
 
 
AT least, we haven't talked ourselves up into a state of having delusions of greatness, life the Welsh have done. Long before the visitors went in front at Cardiff on Saturday, I could only see the game going one way - and that wasn't Wales's.
 
Regular exposure to Australia, New Zealand and South Africa in The Southern Hemisphere Championship has been the making of Argentina; they are now a seriously good side, while Fernandez-Lobbe has, along with McCaw, sealed-off two of the three places in the present-day World Select XV. Indeed, given the quality of Italian skipper Sergio Parisse or French skipper Thierry Dusator, no British Isles back row player would, in my view, get into such a XV.
 
 
 
I AM happy to see Mark Bennett returning, albeit temporarily, from Clermont Auvergne, on-loan to Glasgow Warriors.
 
Wee Mark is the real deal and could well, playing regularly for Warriors, break into the Scotland squad this season - we need him capped, quickly, before he qualifies for France on residential grounds.

Saturday, 10 November 2012

Relax Lads, It's Only The All Blacks - Nae Pressure

HERE we go then, the Autumn Tests are about to kick-off; we can put aside tribal club concerns for three weeks and discover where stands Scotland in the world game.
 
Aye, I'm concerned too. At least that symbol of national well-being: the Scottish fitba team, is so consistently bad that we don't have to worry about the feel-good factor, it just isn't there. With our Braveheart rugby lads, however, things are slightly different.
 
Did we not after all con the Aussies into taking us too lightly during our summer tour of the Pacific region, then, against all the long-established pattern of Scottish consistency, kick-on to beat Samoa and Fiji, to return home unbeaten.
 
We now have some small delusions of adequacy. Thankfully, starting tomorrow at Murrayfield, we hold no great expectations of keeping the run going. After all, there are four certainties in life - birth, death, taxes and the All Blacks will beat Scotland.
 
At least the Scottish team takes the field unburdened by expectations. They are not England or Wales, often deluded but always expectant when their representatives face the men in black. All we ask is that we are not humiliated by McCaw & Co.
 
I honestly cannot see us winning tomorrow - perhaps I am conditioned to see us losing to New Zealand - but if we put on a show, I'll be happy.
 
 
 
THE RBS Premiership action today is allabout catch-up games, while those clubs which have been able to keep playing, through not being in British & Irish Cup action, will indulge themselves in the RBS Regional cups.
 
The team under the most pressure is Gala, who need to keep winning - and racking-up bonus points - as they seek to overhaul Ayr's lead at the top.
 
Already the meeting of Ayr and Gala, at Millbrae, on 3 December, has the look of a title decider; but, only if Gala keep playing to the consistently high level they have in recent weeks.
 
The Premiership is a very tight league, there isn't much between any of the teams and Stirling County, this afternoon and Melrose, at the Greenyards - particularly the latter, hurting terribly from some inexplicable lossees this season - will give Gala two hard games; which, from a Gala stand point are just what they need before the big one at Ayr.
 
 
 
AT THE start of this blog, I mentioned Scotland's lack of expectations in facing the All Blacks. Should we not, perhaps, have some sympathy for the England squad which takes on Fiji at Twickenham.
 
Now, I know such sentiments come hard to Scots, but, really, anything less than a massive win for England and the calls for change will be strident.
 
The English football and rugby teams, even more than the Scottish football team, suffer from the excessive expectation of a supporters constituency who are brought up to believe their team has a divine right to win every game - even though this hasn't been the case for nigh on 100 years, since the rest of the world caught up (football) or overtook them (rugby in New Zealand and South Africa). But still, the belief clings that they HAVE to win every game - because they are England.
 
Stuart Lancaster has made a good start as England coach. I like what the guy is doing, but, the last thing he needs right now is to have the crushing weight of English expectations brought down on him and the stupidity of an English rugby press which can, on occasions, make their stupid football cousins look well-rounded and intelligent.